These are real-life stories of a momma in the trenches of blended family life. They are about love, pain, letting go and grief – sometimes all at once.
My prayer is that, by sharing them, you’ll know you’re not alone. That you know there are mommas just like you out there – some of them marching this life out only a couple of steps ahead of you!
And if these stories bless you, I hope you share them with the mommas following behind us on this trail through motherhood.
Wherever you are in your parenting journey, don’t forget: you’re doing a great job, Mom!
Whether or not you know it yet, the child you want to develop through your parenting efforts is a self-motivated one. Why? Because intrinsically motivated kids are empowered to take care of themselves when you’re not looking. Or micro-managing. Or fretting. Here are three ways to develop intrinsic motivation in your child before they head … Continue reading Three Ways To Promote Intrinsic Motivation In a Child Before School
One day it didn't come. It just stopped. It wasn't the first time, but somehow we are never ready for it when the child supports stops. Surely it was just because of the long weekend. It was Labor Day. I'm sure that's the lag. It will come. And sometimes it does, but if you've been … Continue reading When Child Support Stops
An opportunity for bright, new holiday traditions - without obligation. The holidays are a challenging time of year for single, step and blended families like mine. Traditions that once had sweet roots in the family I created find themselves soured in "the other family" we have become. Every year, I'm confronted by those traditions. Every … Continue reading There Ain’t No Elf On My Shelf (And That’s Okay.)
Where do I belong? I see it in my kids' eyes when they look at me when we reunite after a weekend with their dads. It's a quiet searching, a longing, an uncertainty reaching out for reassurance. It's a question: Where do I belong? Do I belong with you? And I see it in their … Continue reading Family, Creating a Place to Belong
DEAR PUBLIC SCHOOL TEACHERS EVERYWHERE, Don't go. I know a hard wind is blowing - I see the rawness it leaves on my own children's faces when they come home from school each day. I experience the force of it with them when we sit down at our round table to brave homework each afternoon. … Continue reading Lean In: A Response to Wendy Bradshaw PhD’s Resignation Letter
A Story About Family Identity From the Ground Up This week we lost our family dog to cancer, and while the dog was truly the sweetest pup ever, I find myself grieving my mother who gave us the dog and has herself been dead for more than three years. It feels like with every little … Continue reading Mourning My Saints, Remembering My Roots
Co-Parenting from High Ground For Justine, a fellow parent with limited co-parenting options. I had big plans for this article. It was going to be didactic and helpful - a foundational resource article for parents trying to co-parent amicably. Then I read a story about a parent trying to better her life - setting life … Continue reading What to Do When Co-parenting Isn’t an Option
A 12 Year Journey with a Boy Dear Boy, On this night 12 years ago, I was several hours into laboring with you. I was alone in my apartment, but in just one hour, I would have enough of the relentless waves of discomfort and call your father to ask him to drive me to the hospital. … Continue reading A Single Mom’s Letter to Her Son
What’s In a Name? In high school, I got an award for being an “Advice Queen.” At the time (thank you seventeen), I was flattered thinking it meant people thought I was wise. Now, I’m sure that what it really meant was that I shared a heap of unsolicited opinions about things that were none … Continue reading Why Labels Matter, Like It or Not (This is Why I’m Renaming My Husband)
Are kids The Straw That Broke the Camel's Back or the Cat's Meow? and do they know? I'm afraid my kids would say sometimes they feel like they are a burden on me. Ouch. Here's how I came to that realization, and how I hope to get a chorus of meows. A heartbreaking story about … Continue reading How I Make Sure My Kids Feel Like Blessings (Not Burdens)
